Wearing – Denim Jacket by Allen Solly, Green Dress from H&M, Brown Bag from Bewakoof, & Black Trainers from Nike
The first style post of the year was taken at three different locations around Kolkata namely Prinsep Ghat, Victoria Memorial and St. Paul’s Cathedral. I have hardly ever published what I wear daily here on the blog. I have no reason for it but just that I haven’t. Most of my posts have been about styling something I had picked and posting about it. Also I did not intend this post to be some sort of explainer on “how to style a denim jacket”. Yet once I started writing, my words took a different route and I could do nothing but oblige.
This was taken on a day when I was photographing for a collaboration, the details of which are soon to be revealed. As I had a long shoot day ahead, I decided to quickly put together something and well this is it. Winter in Kolkata now has a new definition. It can be described to be cold enough for a thick denim jacket to keep one warm through the day. And the denim jacket served the ultimate purpose for which I had given it a place in my wardrobe.
Once I saw myself in the mirror I was just reminded of an old fleeting thought . I realised that I had just recreated the outfit I had always wanted to wear when I was a teenager. I would peer through newspapers and magazines to update myself on who wore what. But I was too shy to do it myself. The last time I was in school, some seven winters ago, I remember myself being a very different individual. I kept myself locked in a shell and my biggest fear was that of expressing myself. It was a sort of protection. However, I did not realize until now that though it protected me, it also made me miss out on so many things. I was known to be someone who never broke rules. Yet now I wish I had broken a few so that I could have a few interesting stories.
I also had a incessant stage fright back then and though I actively participated, I made sure it was more of a group activity and not a solo one. Yet now I am beginning to discover that my fear of standing on a stage and addressing people was just a fear in my head. My audience is not always as juding me and most often than not I am appreciated for my efforts. Though I still have this fear of public speaking, I am slowly beginning to unwrap that coccoon of fear and self-doubt. Creating my YouTube channel and putting up the first video took a lot from me. But I finally did it and it doesn’t feel so overwhelming anymore.
Though I know how to style a denim jacket, I am still learning to unwrap the invisible jacket of self doubt and fear of expression that binds me from getting in touch with all I can do and all I can be.
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